Forgiveness: The Heart of Christian Faith
Forgiveness: The Heart of Christian Faith
June 2, 2025 | The Way of Life Church Blog
Forgiveness is one of the most challenging aspects of the Christian faith. We often say we forgive someone, but in our hearts, we still hold onto resentment, anger, and pain. We might even pride ourselves on "forgiving but not forgetting" - but is this truly what God calls us to do?
What Does It Mean to Truly Forgive?
In Matthew 18, Peter asks Jesus how many times he should forgive someone who sins against him - suggesting perhaps seven times would be sufficient. Jesus responds with "seventy-seven times" (or "seventy times seven" in some translations), indicating that forgiveness should be limitless.
Jesus then tells a powerful parable about a servant who owed his king an astronomical debt - equivalent to billions of dollars in today's currency. When the servant begged for mercy, the king forgave the entire debt. However, that same servant then found a fellow servant who owed him a much smaller amount (equivalent to a few thousand dollars) and refused to show mercy, even having the man thrown into prison.
When the king heard about this, he was furious and said: "You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant as I had mercy on you?"
Why Do We Struggle to Forgive?
We often struggle with forgiveness because:
- It feels unjust to let someone "get away with" hurting us
- We fear looking foolish or being taken advantage of again
- Our feelings don't align with what we know we should do
- We confuse forgiveness with trust
Is "Forgive But Don't Forget" Biblical?
The phrase "forgive but don't forget" isn't found in scripture. What Jesus teaches is actually more profound: Forgive while never forgetting you are forgiven.
The servant in the parable wasn't condemned for remembering what his fellow servant did wrong. He was condemned because he forgot how much he himself had been forgiven. When we truly understand the magnitude of what God has forgiven us, it changes how we view the debts others owe us.
Forgiveness vs. Trust
An important distinction: forgiveness is not the same as trust. Even Jesus, while loving everyone, "did not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people" (John 2:24-25).
You can forgive someone completely while still establishing healthy boundaries. You can take your keys from someone who keeps wrecking your car while still loving them. The difference is that true forgiveness doesn't come with emotional punishment - the silent treatment, sarcastic remarks, or constant reminders of past wrongs.
The Power of True Forgiveness
When we forgive as God forgives us:
- We release the weight of bitterness we've been carrying
- We maintain our own forgiveness from God (Matthew 6:14-15)
- We become a powerful testimony of God's supernatural love
- We open the door for reconciliation and healing
Consider the story of Jamil McGee and Andrew Collins. Collins, a police officer, falsely accused McGee of a crime that sent him to prison for four years. Years later, after Collins himself had served time for his wrongdoings, the two men not only reconciled but became brothers in faith, writing a book together about forgiveness and reconciliation.
Life Application
Imagine your sins written on a whiteboard - not just actions, but thoughts, intentions, and all the good you failed to do. When you trust in Christ, that board is completely erased. Yet how often do we keep a separate list of offenses others have committed against us?
This week:
- Pray for revelation: Ask God to show you where unforgiveness has taken root in your life.
- Remember your forgiveness: When tempted to hold onto bitterness, recall the magnitude of what God has forgiven you.
- Take a step toward reconciliation: If possible, reach out to someone you need to forgive. You don't have to wait for an apology - extend mercy first, just as Christ did for you.
- Establish healthy boundaries: Remember that forgiveness doesn't mean allowing harmful behavior to continue. You can forgive completely while still setting appropriate boundaries.
Ask yourself: What relationship in my life needs the healing power of true forgiveness? What is holding me back from forgiving as Christ has forgiven me? How might my testimony of forgiveness impact others who don't yet know Christ?
Remember, your faith should lead your feelings, not the other way around. When you choose to forgive in faith, the good feelings will eventually follow.